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CareersNG
Career Development for Nigerians ... A Knowledge Sharing Forum!
Joined: Mon May 22, 2006 11:56 am Posts: 2772 Location: Virtual
I got struck by this recently, and i think its massive enough an issue to deserve a new a topic.
Its good to desire a new Nigeria, Its good to motivate ourselfs and to ve good goals and intention for the nation. But if we fail to identify our core syndrome(or virus) which is selfishness! Then we are missing it all together!
I am beginning to read in between the lines this days. Before, its very easy for me to see how selfish some of our leaders are/were. But this days i am beginning to see this same selfish attitude being very evident in an average Nigerian; looking at our day-to-day activity.
Obviously, u see how people drive everyday in Lagos traffic they wld never give u space even if u are pointing there for an hour!
Even in the way we show kindness or help each other. Sometimes its like as if everybody is fighting each other on the street/and in the Buses in Lagos.
The way we forget about our past sometimes its amazing!.. either our friends, or relatives, or our Alma-mater... the list is infinite, i am sure almost everybody would have felt this one way or the other b4.
Now my worri is; is this the general nature of Man! Or its just peculiar to us in Nigeria/africa
Or are we doing this also because of bad government
Or is it just our culture
This are very silent issues we need to examine. Else so many peoples dreams, business or philanthropic ideas might not just work, because many people just dont care!
If its true that most of us have this problem, then we need to admit it, and find a cure...
My tuts!
_________________ Fowe. Choices make or mar Chances ... add extra care to your choices today.
Hmmm, I was thinking "well-directed" selfishness is one of the main ingredients for success!!!
For example - America wants only itself to have Nuclear Weapons, only itself to be the world power; EU will prefer to patronize agricultural products produced in the EU (even if it is more expensive) etc.
I dont know whether it is right to classify my examples as selfishness. What do u think?
Well if i was ask to comment on those "selfishness" highlighted above i could say that our leader are not looking at selfishness in the broader sense for example, based on X-2-X assumption i would say the leaders of Americans, EU etc are looking at being selfish for their respective jurisdiction, that is to benefit themselves and their people WHILE the situation in Nigeria is that our leaders tends to be selfish towards themselves and their family alone. They fight for their own self interest alone without remembering the people they govern so everybody knows that and tends to behave the same way.
It has been the general syndrome in Nigeria even amogst youth, i was with my people jisting about government and one of them asked a qustion that "If you are there won't you steal yours" and everybody just admit they are going to steal first ! Can you imagine that mentality.
I believe the solution is for everybody to do the right thing first and the government will be force to follow.
_________________ Genius begins great works; Labour alone finishes them
Joined: Mon May 29, 2006 3:06 am Posts: 398 Location: UNKNOWN
But that's what we were taught and how were brought up that way!!
Be Patriotic!! (9ja man: For where?! what did Nigeria ever do for me?)
Help the poor!! (9ja man: Which kind? they should look for jobs)
Settle in Nigeria! (9ja man: My guy if na joke stop am?)
Protest corrupt rule! (9ja man: Wetin concern monkey with banana??)
Please help me!!! (9ja man: Omo guy na O.Y.O. o!)
and the list goes on (
9ja man: Na me born u?,
9ja man: everybody bear ur papa name!!)
Joined: Mon May 29, 2006 3:06 am Posts: 398 Location: UNKNOWN
But that's what we were taught and how were brought up that way!!
Be Patriotic!! (9ja man: For where?! what did Nigeria ever do for me?)
Help the poor!! (9ja man: Which kind? they should look for jobs)
Settle in Nigeria! (9ja man: My guy if na joke stop am?)
Protest corrupt rule! (9ja man: Wetin concern monkey with banana??)
Please help me!!! (9ja man: Omo guy na O.Y.O. o!)
and the list goes on (
9ja man: Na me born u?,
9ja man: everybody bear ur papa name!!)
Permit me to just contribute my own little quota to the topic been discussed. I sincerely believe that before our country evolves out of the "Selfish Syndrome", just as noticed by other guys we will need to get one thing right and that is our "LEADERSHIP"!! We really do not need a Messiah of another JESUS incarnate, but definitely a MAN who is ready to LEAD and act RESPONSIBLY and take responsibility for his/her ACTIONS!!! What legacy are the so called leaders leaving behind or rather equipping the budding generations with??? We will rather celebrate the likes of an "Ibori" and his other PDP cronies even at the Church and not even the so called "Men of God" seems to care or awake the nations conscience to this particular syndrome. What about the broken or splintered homes all around us where the WINNER takes it ALL, and childrens grows out of such home. The list is endless my brother. Maybe we shd just rather begin to channel our "Self Centredness" to help in the little way we can but for the collective "NIGERIAN" or "BLACK RACE", I can only wonder.......................
Havent been able to read through it all but let me make it known that we have it as a secret cherished culture to be selfish but it is easier to live and make it by being unselfish and unrelunctantly public serving.
Dont you think it is the mentality of multinationals? Mircosofts etc?
We dont need a leader to do it since many fail with time, we ourslves ought to think of beginning it and sure we can make profit too by it!
_________________ Ideabroker(c)- Ideas that fuel positive change come from the Most High God. Ibroker(c)
Joined: Mon May 22, 2006 11:56 am Posts: 2772 Location: Virtual
All this ones we are talking about is still good... if na only selfishness we dey experience for nija it for good if you no send me, and i no send you too, and you leave me alone, it for better. But what of what Yorubaa's call 'Ogune Idile' Asin people are not happy about you doing something great or becoming successful. I was discoursing with a friend and he said, many Nigerians dont like to come back home not because they dont know that they can make it on their own and make the country better. But because the closest people to them would be first to want their downfall! And many do this actively making every effort to see that you are not successful. This is one of the few Nigerian problems that is not discusses officially as a problem. But the fact is that many of us are aware of this, and we know its a problem! Many dont wana goto their villages or home towns. Not because they dont have something to offer. But because they would make more enemies by trying to do good. So why we analyze and talk about diaspora Nigerians coming back home, and also being unselfish. We need to also consider this factor! Many a times believe selfishness is the safest attitude to survive! Na serious matter ooooooo What do you guys think
_________________ Fowe. Choices make or mar Chances ... add extra care to your choices today.
Well, we have to then begin to form coalitions that can not be attached by Ogun Idile. We need to start to take of taking up löocations in Nija where we are able to shut out unlikely fellows begining from our homes! Its sad that one has to learn to cut off even his family but this time around. It is the price of greatness or success. I for one can tell as good as anybody at home off cos I dont depend on 'dia moni but ma swaeat'. Make we try be independent of each other not be selfish to the extent of being close enuf to effect a downfall.
_________________ Ideabroker(c)- Ideas that fuel positive change come from the Most High God. Ibroker(c)
Joined: Mon May 22, 2006 11:56 am Posts: 2772 Location: Virtual
Now that we know that we all selfish! is the solution telling ouselves not to be selfish? or showing ourselves a better way to be selfish? or even giving ourselves different, more and better selfish gains!
because i dont think this selfishness thing is limited to Nigeria, there is a line of taught that humans are fundamentaly selfish...
or is there anything like SmartSelfishness
_________________ Fowe. Choices make or mar Chances ... add extra care to your choices today.
I have been trying to answer a question, that is, "what does really matter?"
What really really matters??! I have concluded that it is two things and that is; Love and life!
One thing is this, you may doubt or argue against it, but, there is no one who is more interested in you than you. No one! No human being really is. Some claim to, some try to, some really really want to BUT we dont seem to be made to be able to do otherwise. Sad truth but reality.
This drives each one to be selfish or have self ambition or self liking desire. You have to have a self love! If you dont then you couldnt be a balance human being! Its self love (or selfishness) that makes us eat right at the least. Self love means to care for ones self. It is a duty placed on each of us by our creator. Any denial of it means we are getting self deluded. Its a psychological abnorm.
This brings a dichotomy into the situation or description of selfishness.
Therefore, I will like to redefine words to say that: Be not selfish but self loving. If you are self loving, you will take to heart; love thy neighbor as thy self! If you love your neighbor just as you love yourself then you can live and all others too alongside. Your decisions will be perfect for you and those around you. Your love and tendencies will not be destructive to anyone.
This is my humble submission.
_________________ Ideabroker(c)- Ideas that fuel positive change come from the Most High God. Ibroker(c)
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